Jan. 17th, 2012 06:07 pm
inbloom: (Default)
The doctor says I have mild cervical dysplasia. They took a biopsy and will test it and send me more information in the mail. He says it MIGHT be moderate, but it's not severe, so that's good. I think his treatment will be to sit on it for 6 months, have another pap, and if it's better, they'll just monitor me closely.

Honestly, it was the weirdest fucking thing seeing my cervix on a computer screen.
inbloom: (Default)
Appointment tomorrow at UVA in Charlottesville. The only thing I can say to myself to keep me from having a major panic attack is that whatever is wrong, if there IS anything wrong, can be fixed.

Fingers are crossed.

Now, off to watch Doctor Who with the boyfriend and relax. Tomorrow is my first day off in six days. Although I have to get up at 7, at least it's not for work!!!
inbloom: (genius or insane? a bit of both.)
Things have been going relatively well lately, despite the massive clusterfuck that was the beginning of the month.

Work has been alright for the most part. There hasn't been as much drama, but I've been in toys pretty much every shift, so maybe I'm just missing it. I prefer it this way! My d-day is coming off next month and I'm seriously thinking about going for the connection center position. I'll still be able to help out in photo, but I desperately need a change. Plus, it's a lot more pay, and I'm really going to need it soon.

Nate and I are getting our own place. He needs to get his Firebird on the road and I need to get my car fixed. Hopefully his dad will finish putting the axle on so I can get the rest of the parts. I think most of it is just minor things now, but I still need to switch the tires from the Mazda to the Honda. We're thinking of either getting a place in Rustburg or Altavista. Rustburg is closer to his work and would be better on gas for him, whereas Altavista is where I work and better on gas for me. Ehh. His parents mentioned renting the house out to us while they find a trailer. We'll see.

I haven't really had much contact with my family lately, except for a few phone calls. I told Mom about Nate and me getting our own place and I think she wants to come too. I don't know how to say no, that I want it to be just us on our own. I feel bad about it, but it's what needs to happen.

Christina randomly asked if Nate and I wanted to come watch her boyfriend and his band play on Saturday. Soooo I think we have plans (if Nate will get off Star Wars, hahahaha).

I am exhausted, so it is bedtime for moi.
inbloom: (Default)
This week has been pretty horrible.

Let's see... oh yeah, I got into a car accident on Tuesday. It was my fault (failure to yield right of way at stop sign) but I swear if that chick had hit her brakes at all, we wouldn't have been in an accident. She hit me going 55mph. The Lumina seems to be in good shape--her Kia only tore off the plastic part of the bumper. I think there are some paint scrapes, but that side is fucked up anyway from when Theresa backed into it.

I called out of work because I was so jittery and a crying mess that I couldn't even think about driving over half an hour to work. And today I was supposed to be at work at 8...woke up at 8. I freaked out and called work and Keith calmed me down. Ugh, idk what I'd do if I had another ZMS. He's so good to me. ANYWAY, today, I told him I'd work on my day off (tomorrow) to make up the hours. Sort of suck, but I definitely need the hours. I only had 29 to begin with!!

And then today, I went to Exxon in Altavista to get gas. I went inside and paid first, came back out, put the nozzle into the gas tank, squeezed, AND GOT SPRAYED WITH GAS. WTF. I didn't even realize it at first until I felt it hit my hand. I freaked out and told the lady at the register what happened and she said "Oh yeah, we had that problem the week before." UHHHH.... that kind of thing is highly dangerous! Jesus! She said she wrote a letter to her manager, but god damn, you'd have thought they would have done something after the first customer bitched them out. I thought it had something to do with the accident and I thought I had broke the gas tank lmao, but it was just the pump. I got gas on my new coat :(

Nathan got me into Star Wars: The Old Republic. It reminds me so much of Mass Effect, I love it!! I am staying away from interacting with other players, though. I like to pretend it's on Xbox hahaha.

And speaking of Nathan! Things are going really, really well. I can't even explain it, it's just so good. We had a really long talk the other night and I think part of him feels that the reason he never got his car on the road after Savannah dumped him was beacuse he was depressed. And now he's not and he's taking charge of his life again. I like to think I helped things along. Ahhh, I love him.

Anyway, enough rambling. Later dudes.
inbloom: (Default)
For Christmas, Nathan bought me a Nook. At first, I wasn't too sure how I'd like it--I get distracted sometimes and lose my place and I tend to reread certain passages to remind myself where I am. I wasn't sure if I would like having to go back a page or two to remind myself. But when I finally set it up and started reading Stephen King's Bag of Bones, ugh, I completely fell in love! I can just put it in my purse and not have to worry about lugging a huge book with me just to read at work. Ahh, this boy.

We've actually been having some problems lately. I know it's mostly my problems. I've never actually done anything like this before. We're living together, we're getting our own place, but I truly do love him. I just get so angry :( I don't know if it's stress or if I have some mental disorder that never went diagnosed... I read over my lj entries not too long ago and I was horrified at how I reacted over things. Although at the time most of that stuff happened, I was going through a lot and not receiving the proper therapy I needed, so that could explain it. All of the stress and tension with Nate when we're both being douchebags is spilling over into work. I get so testy. Maybe it's just seasonal depression, I dunno. Mainly I get mad over him being on xbox and Star Wars.

David's car broke down the other day. The motor blew while he was on 24. He said it might take around $300 to fix. He has no job... He barely works for Jeff anymore, so all he does is bum around. He's actually been staying at Mom's lately, and with him having no job, he's been coming to me for money. It wasn't as bad when he was living with Alyssa, but he's home now. No one to mooch off, mainly because he's already spent all of her money.

All of this? The reason I left home. I had no money because David forced me to give him money in exchange for a ride to work, no car because he eventually stopped taking me to work but still wanted money. I cannot support while while I am living here with Nathan. I mean, fuck, I had no money to do what I needed to do when we were living together. How am I supposed to support BOTH him and my mom and then support myself? I work at WALMART, that shit does not pay well. And I have to buy parts for my car and then save up for a security deposit for our place and this shit does not bode well. It's not going to end pretty.

All I'm basically saying right now is that I've changed since coming to Nathan's. I cannot, as I see myself right now, go back to how things used to be. I love my family and do not want things to be fucked up. We were fucked over by Rhonda, it's just us. I just can't do it :( I can't bring myself to go back there. And it's going to ruin our relationship.

And also? He'd kind of really immature. He still seems the same David from 5 years ago. Nothing's changed. He just doesn't hit me anymore.
inbloom: (Default)
I imported my livejournal here, but I don't know if I should have. It's 10 years worth of me, but holy shit I was so weird, lmao.

I need to make New Years Resolutions. Maybe this will be the year I actually stick to them. I think I really do need them. :\
inbloom: (Default)
credit goes to ___aliform

This is my life. I've recently seen Supernatural and am completely in love with it. Muse = ♥

Just let me know you've friended me and I'll add you back.

Have a nice day. :)
inbloom: (Default)
This is pretty damn spiffy. I'm glad to be a part of this.
inbloom: (can't fool cordy / ATS / kornpeep)
Leave me an ANONYMOUS comment with one or more:

_an insult
_a secret
_a criticism
_a crush
_a compliment
_a death threat
_a love note
_a song
_a picture
_anything else you want.

Do as many as you want. Then paste this challenge in your own journal.
inbloom: (Default)
Hermioneg28 [1:29 PM]: Over and done with
Hermione2341 [1:30 PM]: k....so whatcha wanna do?
Hermioneg28 [1:30 PM]: rp?
Hermioneg28 [1:30 PM]: Kazaa is closed... ;p
Hermione2341 [1:31 PM]: Paired Off
Hermione2341 [1:31 PM]: remember where we left off?
Hermioneg28 [1:32 PM]: Dance
Hermione2341 [1:32 PM]: good....so what happened??
Hermione2341 [1:32 PM]: :-D
Hermioneg28 [1:32 PM]: Hmm... twas after Kim sang... I believe.
Hermione2341 [1:33 PM]: ooooooooooooooh!!!!!!! OKIES! me remember now!
Hermione2341 [1:33 PM]: sugar rush!
Hermioneg28 [1:33 PM]: WATER RUSH!
Hermione2341 [1:33 PM]: never have sugar at 7:30 in the morning!
Hermioneg28 [1:33 PM]: Never have water... EVER! IT IS EVIL! EVIL, I TELL YOU!
Hermione2341 [1:34 PM]: and it tatses like poo!
Hermioneg28 [1:34 PM]: O.o
Hermioneg28 [1:34 PM]: Poo's best on crackers.
Hermione2341 [1:34 PM]: ::gags::
Hermioneg28 [1:35 PM]: *snickers*
Hermione2341 [1:35 PM]: why yes I'd love one!
Hermioneg28 [1:36 PM]: *hands you poo shaped like a snickers bar on crackers* Yummy yum yum!



inbloom: (Default)

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